A Bit About Me

My photo
Along with my daily duties as founder and head writer of HumorMeOnline.com, in 2003, I took the Grand Prize in the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest (also known as the "It Was a Dark and Stormy Night" competition). I've also been a contributor to "The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson" and the web's "The Late Show with David Letterman". I also occupy my time writing three blogs, "Blogged Down at the Moment", "Brit Word of the Day" and "Production Numbers"...and my off-time is spent contemplating in an "on again/off again" fashion...my feable attempts at writing any one of a dozen books. I would love to write professionally one day...and by that I mean "actually get a paycheck".

12 April 2012

Day 12: Fear

It's nearly two weeks since we've all decided to jump on Ziva's bandwagon and take photos along the way. I have thoroughly enjoyed seeing all the different takes on the daily theme and seeing what I'll eventually go with.

I'm figuring the next couple of weeks will be harder than the beginning. I guess we'll all find out soon.

So...please check on Ziva's name in the first paragraph to find out what this contest is about...and then click on the participants to see what they've come up with. (My photo/blurb is directly following.)

Day 12: Fear

"Whatever you do...don't...look...under...the...BED!"

What could possibly be more scary than a creepazoid axe murderer hiding underneath the thing we fall asleep on? Yeah...I grew up as a child (and well until my adulthood) checking inside the closet and under the bed before I retired for the nite. Fear will come and get you; no amount of hiding under covers is going to stop the thing which really isn't under the bed from crawling out and getting you. If you don't check beforehand...you are doomed. All kids know this...I knew this until I was about 30. Hey, some take longer than others...so don't judge me. This is the number one reason why I cannot watch scary films...I have a vivid imagination and way too many fears...and then the movie people go and invent some more.

But, the "thing under the bed" is, by far, the most fear-provoking in my opinion...so it gets the nod. (The "nod" provided in the photo is my daughter -- someone had to look under there...it certainly wasn't going to be me!)


  1. Even though I'm definitely old enough to got past the monsters-under-the-bed fear, it still bothers me.

    If I'm too hot, so decide to poke a foot out to enjoy a bit of cold air, monsters still cross my mind.

    Actually, it is not so much 'monsters', it's just the idea of a cold hand...

  2. Your daughter is a really good sport. Never worried about things under the bed or in the closet. Real people were ever so much more frightening and still are.

  3. I think it would have been creepier if you had a hand reaching out to touch her. Now THAT would be creepy. :)

  4. Sure, sacrifice the kid... that's the way to protect your best interests! Excuse me but now I must go bribe my daughter to check out the downstairs closet...

  5. "What could possibly be more scary than a creepazoid axe murderer hiding underneath the bed"


    Awesome photo Mariann!!

  6. So me being 26 and all, is it okay if I still check for monsters under the bed and in the closet whenever M's away? And, is it okay if I get a running start and jump onto the bed from a distance, so the murderer can't grab my ankle while I'm standing next to the bed...?



  7. Oh, yeah, those dust bunnies scare the crap out of me!

  8. Hey...everyone...it is perfectly okay to check. The people who never checked -- those are the ones who aren't with us anymore. Keep that in mind. :)

    Truth be told - I actually vacuummed that rug before she looked under there...so minimal dust bunny trauma was inflicted. ;)

  9. A few months ago, my sons were wrestling around, jumped on my bed and broke the frame. Since that time, my mattresses are directly on the floor. So nothing can be under it. I keep meaning to get a new frame but, well... :-)

  10. Oh my GOSH. I had so many nightmares of something under my bed that every time I got out of bed I JUMPED as far as I could before hitting the ground. Because the wolf under the bed can reach FAR!