A Bit About Me

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Along with my daily duties as founder and head writer of HumorMeOnline.com, in 2003, I took the Grand Prize in the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest (also known as the "It Was a Dark and Stormy Night" competition). I've also been a contributor to "The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson" and the web's "The Late Show with David Letterman". I also occupy my time writing three blogs, "Blogged Down at the Moment", "Brit Word of the Day" and "Production Numbers"...and my off-time is spent contemplating in an "on again/off again" fashion...my feable attempts at writing any one of a dozen books. I would love to write professionally one day...and by that I mean "actually get a paycheck".

25 March 2006

Eat Your Heart Out

Today I managed to do something that I've only done once or twice before...and I'm incredibly proud of myself....I walked out of Fresh Market (corner of Eastern Blvd and Vaughn Rd) for less than $50. Oh, sure..."easy" you say...well...a little bit more about myself...then you judge. I've been "gourmet" cooking since I was about 16. I took it upon myself, and how I ever knew is beyond me, to subscribe to Gourmet and the long since defunct Cuisine magazines...and tried everything that whet my appetite. Now, I am not judging, so don't take it personally if this describes you...but I had girlfriends at whose houses I would stay overnite when I was young, where Monday was "meatloaf" day, Tuesday was "spaghetti", Wednesday was "hot dogs", etc., every single week...month after month...year after year. My mother was Belgian...and we never had those things...once in a while my father would make spaghetti...but he was from Czechoslovakian descent and most of the things he would make weren't normal fare...but some were quite good, nevertheless. Perhaps this is where I acquired my taste for experimentation.

I never really "learned" to cook from either parent, in fact I don't know how I got the urge to take it upon myself, especially at such an early age, to take the reins in the kitchen in the first place. I was not content with everyday meals...I had to make these 2-3 hour extravaganzas...and I still do...which brings us back to Fresh Market. The first day I set foot in the place...as Deborah Kerr said to Cary Grant about her meeting him at the top of the Empire State Building in "An Affair to Remember"...it was "the nearest thing to heaven". I was like the proverbial kid in a candy shop...and I had suddenly grown a massive sweet tooth. It was my culinary Holy Grail. Oh don't mock me...it was...and is.

If you've never been to Fresh Market...I'm at a quandary whether to tell you to go beyond all means...or NOT. It's kinda like me having my first taste of Grey Goose vodka...I'm now spoiled and every vodka pales in comparison. There are rows upon rows of the nicest fruits and vegetables you've ever had the pleasure to lay eyes and fingers upon...and their meats are just divine. They also have some of the nicest people working there I've ever had the pleasure to see in any store...they genuinely seem to like their jobs...in fact, my son worked there for a time and shared this sentiment. And if you are like me, and love all sorts of things like organic arugula, muscovy duck breast...pheasant, rabbit, and dolmades...this is your kind of place...but don't, whatever you do, come hungry...like I usually do...because chances are you won't get out of there for less than $50 either.

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