I ventured over to the newly opened "Halloween" store the other day; the one on the Eastern Boulevard by Lowe's (or is it Home Depot) where the "Goody's" used to be. Now I'm no Einstein, but I'd say this is probably a "seasonal" store...as I doubt they are planning to sell Halloween items year 'round...and at the beginning of November they'll pull up stakes (a Dracula pun)...and count (yet another!) their proceeds. I really don't think "The Christmas Store" will move in after - but you never can tell; but one would presume "The Christmas Store" would still do a lot more business than "The Saint Patrick's Day Store" -- or at least one would hope.
Now Montgomery is no stranger to giant Halloween stores...they had one a couple Halloween's ago - and these might be the same people, only in a different location...but the people who did one up prior - were MUCH more into it...and it was nearly a whole haunting experience to even set foot in the place. This one had some decorations laid out and a fog machine or two churning out some acrid smoke which I started wondering about 10 minutes in...whether or not the pellets were laced with cyanide or at least a hefty portion of lead paint...but seeing I'm still here and it's been like two weeks...chances are good I won't die from it now.
Apart from the lack of scare factor and the smelly smoke...the first thing I noticed is that the place is laid out with two distinct sides: the children side...and the adult side. And once you start rummaging around on the "adult side"...well, you'll see why.
It's naughty.
Sexy goth girl, sexy vampiress, sexy bar wench, sexy pixie chick, sexy nurse, sexy French maid...and the one that made my poor Catholic eyes burn in their sockets: sexy nun. Now I don't know about you...but if you are buying a sexy nun costume - you have just procured...and secured... your space in Hell.
Those of you who aren't that aware with the laws and bi-laws of Alabama - might not be aware that you can't sell porn here...or paraphernalia thereof...altho the "Love Stuff" store gets around this...uh...loophole..and sells these items for "educational purposes only". Don't believe me? Check out their web site online...which you have to look at in the "cached" mode - as it's not there anymore...hmmm...
But needless to say - selling these costumes is okie dokie during Halloween...I guess as long as you have a clear delineation line between the kid's stuff and the...um...well, love stuff...aka...adult Halloween costumes.
Please don't get me wrong - I have no problem with "dressing up" per se...heaven knows I've semi-fantasized about Hugh Jackman in a Conquistador outfit on more than one occasion...but then again...who hasn't?
But it just strikes me as funny - and ironic - that you can buy these outfits...which are clearly not intended for Halloween purposes only...in a state which forbids a painting of a naked nymph on a bottle of wine. (Yes, Alabama...I'll never let you live that one down.)
Still...hands down the naughtiest costume ever (and Walmart even sold it) in my opinion is this bovine one; be forewarned...this will make you spit milk out of your nose if you're drinking it when you look...and how appropriate is that?
Now Montgomery is no stranger to giant Halloween stores...they had one a couple Halloween's ago - and these might be the same people, only in a different location...but the people who did one up prior - were MUCH more into it...and it was nearly a whole haunting experience to even set foot in the place. This one had some decorations laid out and a fog machine or two churning out some acrid smoke which I started wondering about 10 minutes in...whether or not the pellets were laced with cyanide or at least a hefty portion of lead paint...but seeing I'm still here and it's been like two weeks...chances are good I won't die from it now.
Apart from the lack of scare factor and the smelly smoke...the first thing I noticed is that the place is laid out with two distinct sides: the children side...and the adult side. And once you start rummaging around on the "adult side"...well, you'll see why.
It's naughty.
Sexy goth girl, sexy vampiress, sexy bar wench, sexy pixie chick, sexy nurse, sexy French maid...and the one that made my poor Catholic eyes burn in their sockets: sexy nun. Now I don't know about you...but if you are buying a sexy nun costume - you have just procured...and secured... your space in Hell.
Those of you who aren't that aware with the laws and bi-laws of Alabama - might not be aware that you can't sell porn here...or paraphernalia thereof...altho the "Love Stuff" store gets around this...uh...loophole..and sells these items for "educational purposes only". Don't believe me? Check out their web site online...which you have to look at in the "cached" mode - as it's not there anymore...hmmm...
But needless to say - selling these costumes is okie dokie during Halloween...I guess as long as you have a clear delineation line between the kid's stuff and the...um...well, love stuff...aka...adult Halloween costumes.
Please don't get me wrong - I have no problem with "dressing up" per se...heaven knows I've semi-fantasized about Hugh Jackman in a Conquistador outfit on more than one occasion...but then again...who hasn't?
But it just strikes me as funny - and ironic - that you can buy these outfits...which are clearly not intended for Halloween purposes only...in a state which forbids a painting of a naked nymph on a bottle of wine. (Yes, Alabama...I'll never let you live that one down.)
Still...hands down the naughtiest costume ever (and Walmart even sold it) in my opinion is this bovine one; be forewarned...this will make you spit milk out of your nose if you're drinking it when you look...and how appropriate is that?
