Day 24: And then she said

She was going to make this outstandingly awesome blog about film editing...and then she said, "Shit!  The song doesn't have those exact words in it.  I could have sworn it did...but it doesn't."

 

She then copy/pasted/mailed the text she had written to herself in an email to herself as she always does when she writes her lame-o blog and then she just sat there thinking.

 

She thought a while.  Nothing was coming to her mind.  Sure, she could write a stupid segue to her original thought...but that was just, well, pretty lame again. 

 

She thought, originally, when seeing the prompt, always just right before she typed her blog...never reading them ahead of time, because she really did like the spontaneity of her mind thinking things one way and then ending up a whole other -- that it reminded her of that "She Said She Said" song by the Beatles.  "But," she thought to herself, "everyone would have probably thought of that straight away...but then again I bet no one has. But, it's not that great a blog idea anyway...not anywhere's as good as the film editing in the film musical, 'Chicago' with Catherine Zeta-Jones, Renee Zellweger, Richard Gere, Queen Latifah...and all the others in it."

 

But, while the intro to her blog was magnificent, citing Charles Chaplin's 1931 "City Lights" film and the fact he shot 314,256 feet of film and edited it down to 8.093 feet, pretty much single-handedly -- while also writing, directing, starring, and producing it, she had to scrap that idea -- pretty much like Chaplin had to scrap 306,163 feet of film.  Only, Chaplin was pure genius...and she was only "eh".

 

She always thinks everything she writes is "eh" because the times she thought it was "pretty damned good" no one paid much attention anyway.  It was like when she was in school and she'd always, always think she did poorly on a test, because it was so much easier finding out later that you did a great job than being disappointed if it turned out the other way around.  What a let-down to get your hopes up...best not to set them too high.

 

As it turns out, she's always secretly wishing, inside her head, that things will turn out great -- while still trying to convince her inner self that she doesn't. This whole "inner self talking to your other inner self" process is quite difficult.  She wonders if everyone thinks like she does.  "That" she says to herself, "would be awfully weird." Only she's not actually saying it out loud because THAT would probably be a bad sign, and no amount of thinking something good while trying to convince yourself something totally different...would ever change that one.  Talking to your own self with your own mouth with your own words coming out of it is definitely a bad thing.

 

But then, out of the blue, and just out of curiosity, she mustered up the courage and spoke aloud the words, "Or IS it?"

 

So far, so good. 

 

And then she said, but only where her head could hear, "Hmmmm...I simply can do that alone after all."

(In case you are all wondering, I thought the song in "Chicago" said "And then she said" - but it says "She'd say" instead...so I had to scrap my whole original idea. It also won the Academy Award aka "Oscar" for best film editing in 2002. This blog, in my opinion, would have been written so much more eloquently...and interestingly...if only...)

And, if you're still reading this...go on over to "We Work for Cheese" to read about everyone else's take on today's prompt, which again is "And then she said".  Go on - go on over.  You can do it...and you can do it alone.

Jailed Man's YouTube Video Reaches One Million "Self-Hits" in Two Months

(Photo of Paul Bremis inside Police Cruiser)

A man in prison posts a YouTube video - and it gets a million hits.  Most of them his.

 

Yes, believe it or not a man in a Chicago prison uploaded a video of himself watching a video of himself and it went viral - but not in the way you'd think.

 

Paul Bremis, who is serving a six-month sentence for a traffic violation in which he not only failed to yield to merging traffic but also did not have a valid license, decided he should make the most of his incarceration, stated,  "I figured I'm in jail, I have a lot of time on my hands, why not do something fun?"

 

The video which Bremis, 24, uploaded to YouTube, shows himself being pulled over by police and subsequently led away.  But, Bremis decided to give the video a bit of spin by changing the dialogue and then showing himself watching the video ranting and raving that everything he said on the police dashcam was altered.

 

Confused yet?  Hold on, there's more.

 

Bremis then set out to get the video to go viral but all his attempts at directing traffic to it (no pun intended) via Facebook, Reddit, and Twitter failed to yield (again no pun intended) the desired hits.

 

"I thought it was a funny video.  I see a lot of stuff on Facebook and other social media sites that really suck and they go viral.  I figured if mine goes viral, maybe can get a bunch of sympathetic stupid people giving me money and I'd be able to buy a new car or something." Bremis said yesterday.  "Seems like people will give other people money over the dumbest things they do wrong, and I figured I might as well jump at my chance.  Hell, for all I know this might be the only time in my life I'll ever get arrested."

 

But, Bremis' plan backfired, when, after a week the video only had 12 hits...10 of them his own. 

 

"That's when I got an idea." Bremis said.  "I figured if I can keep clicking on the video, I can keep getting hits registered and then when it gets enough hits, it will go viral and I'll end up on 'Good Morning America' where the big money is.  I wasn't going anywhere all day and night anyway, so I got nothing to lose."

 

After two months of constant clicking his video finally reached he one million mark.  "I thought it was going to take a lot longer." Bremis stated, "I'm no math whiz, but I thought I wouldn't be able to pull it off.  They always told us things in school like it would take you 2000 years to count all the interest a million dollars makes, you know, if you started counting it right now.  And, as a kid, you believe that stuff.  But this totally proves them wrong.  I mean, here it is, two months later and I have over a million hits, most of them mine."

 

And the Chicago City Jail collaborates those figures.  "I wouldn't have believed it myself." Chief Warden Anthony Bruglia stated.  "Bremis is right about the math they teach you in school.  It has to be wrong.  I never would have guessed he could click that many times just sitting here in jail.  It kinda gives everyone else here hope in a way, I think.  You know, that they can achieve something no one ever imagined."

 

As far as that money for a new car?  Donations to Bremis' PayPal account are already totaling in excess of $54,000. 

 

Jailed Man's YouTube Video Reaches One Million "Self Hits" in Two Months

Photo of Paul Bremis inside police cruiser.

A man in prison posts a YouTube video - and it gets a million hits.  Most of them his.

Yes, believe it or not, a man in a Chicago prison uploaded a video of himself watching a video of himself and it went viral - but not in the way you'd think.

Paul Bremis, who is serving a six-month sentence for a traffic violation in which he not only failed to yield to merging traffic but also did not have a valid license, decided he would make the most of his incarceration. "I figured I'm in jail, I have a lot of time on my hands, why not do something fun?"

The video which Bremis, 24, uploaded to YouTube, shows himself being pulled over by police and subsequently led away.  But, Bremis decided to give the video a bit of spin by changing the dialogue and then showing himself watching the video ranting and raving that everything he said on the police dashcam was altered.

Confused yet?  Hold on, there's more.

Bremis then set out to get the video to go viral but all his attempts at directing traffic to it (no pun intended) via Facebook, Reddit, and Twitter failed to yield (again no pun intended) the desired hits.

"I thought it was a funny video.  I see a lot of stuff on Facebook and other social media sites that really suck and they go viral.  I figured if mine goes viral, maybe I can get a bunch of sympathetic stupid people giving me money and then I'd be able to buy a new car or something." Bremis said yesterday.  "Seems like people will give other people money over the dumbest things they do wrong, and I figured I might as well jump at my chance.  Hell, for all I know this might be the only time in my life I'll ever get arrested."

But, Bremis' plan backfired when, after a week, the video only had 12 hits...10 of them his own.

  

"That's when I got an idea." Bremis said.  "I figured if I can keep clicking on the video, I can keep getting hits registered and then when it gets enough hits, it will go viral and I'll end up on 'Good Morning America' where the big money is.  I wasn't going anywhere all day and night anyway, so I got nothing to lose."

After two months of constant clicking his video finally reached one million hits.  "I thought it was going to take a lot longer." Bremis stated, "I'm no math whiz, but I thought I wouldn't be able to pull it off.  They always told us things in school like it would take you 2000 years to count all the interest a million dollars makes, you know, if you started counting it right now.  And, as a kid, you believe that stuff.  But this totally proves them wrong.  I mean, here it is, two months later and I have over a million hits, most of them my own."

And the Chicago City Jail collaborates those figures.  "I wouldn't have believed it myself." Chief Warden Anthony Bruglia, stated.  "Bremis is right about the math they teach you in school.  It has to be wrong.  I never would have guessed he could click that many times just sitting here in jail.  It kinda gives everyone else here hope in a way, I think.  You know, that they can achieve something no one ever imagined."

As far as that money for a new car?  Donations to Bremis' PayPal account are already totaling in excess of $54,000. 

Facebook 'Goes Down' in History

Millions of people were left stranded in their cars, in their houses, and at area businesses earlier today when Facebook had a malfunction.

As insane as it may sound, people actually had to drive with both hands on the steering wheel or sip their morning coffee staring blankly at their cereal boxes (a phenomenon which has not happened since the social media giant took the Internet world by storm back in the "'00s").  Some people could not even get dressed as their pleas for "What should I wear today???" were met with "try again in a few minutes" prompts over and over again.

Sally Bergeron, from upstate New York, had this to say, "I got up this morning and Fluffy, my cat...this one...in this photo and this photo...and isn't she just sooooo cute here as she's a photo diva for sure.  Um...wait just a second...there she goes again...oh, she's showing me her butt!  How cute!  I gotta post this up to Facebook, just a second..."

Grant LaPierre, a long-time San Francisco resident, said he had gotten up early to check his email and to see what cat photos had been posted by his Facebook friends, but was shocked to learn he couldn't give a "Thumbs Up" nod to any of them.  "Hey, this is how you lose friends" he said, "I can't begin to tell you how many people 'unfriended' me back in September 2010 when Facebook crashed before.  It was horrible.  They thought I didn't like their cats.  It was all the more gut-wrenching this time because they knew I just got a dog.  I guess I'll have to do a bit of back-tracking to make it all right.  Thanks a LOT, Facebook...you'll be hearing from my lawyers tomorrow."

According to the Chicago Tribune, Facebook acknowledged the problem, but insisted it was only for a "brief period of time"...even though service was down for several hours across the globe.

"We're sorry for the inconvenience" a Facebook representative stated, "We know how many of you rely on Facebook for news of the world, of your friends and family, and of their cherished pets.  We honestly had no idea the global impact of not seeing a link from a friend of a YouTube viral video of a cat playing with a laser pointer...would have on the world.  We are sorry...and we will strive not to have anything like this happen again.  Honestly, it was our server guy.  It was his fault...not ours.  I hear he doesn't even LIKE cats!"

Facebook service did resume to its full capacity after a few hours although their stock did plummet in the early morning hours.  General Mills stock, ironically, gained a few points and finished nicely at the end of the day.